Mary Poppins says supercalifragilisticexpialidocious stands for a quality so indescribable you have no real word for it. Much like Mary’s word, mine stands for a quality so indescribably douche-ious… that there is no real word that can describe the super-superficial.
My friends around the world will probably plug the world “jelly” at the end of this post. Yet, I feel not a single ounce of jealousy that would warrant such a word, a lame word at that. (By the way, I dislike abbreviated meaningless words. I heard one the other day that was longer than the actual word. It makes no sense, all the weird words that float through society, like amazeballs or awesomesauce.)
My man is a man of forgiveness, one that will be your friend no matter what. He is a forgive and forget type of person and being cut from the same cloth, this worked well for us. We would have problems with people but look to the better side of one’s features and forgive people, even when he or we shouldn’t.
After years of enduring countless problems with people, I have learned to step away from people that are no good for me. I have learned to let go instead of holding onto what I wanted rather than what is. I don’t completely rid people from my life but there’s the whole “at an arm’s length” that I now live by. I don’t have to hate people, but they don’t have to be my best friend either. Learning the word NO can be so liberating, if you never or rarely use it, you should!
He on the other hand is a lot more forgiving of people and their mishaps. He will be more understanding and want to play nice with more people than he should. As you can imagine, that does not coincide with my need to let go of people that I shouldn’t have as friends. I want to let go of someone and he wants to hold onto them.
I do feel like I have an abundance of friends and a lot of really good friends. There are people that I cherish and would drop anything and everything for, if the need should occur. Those same people are the types of people that wouldn’t ask me for a single thing. They wouldn’t want anything but my love and support. Those people are the genuine people that I love to be surrounded by.
Unfortunately for me I live in LA. With that comes the superficial, the know-it-alls and the brag, brag, braggers! Can I say that I absolutely despise these types of people? Why, yes, I can! So, let me tell you… I despise people that feel the need to flaunt their superficial douche-ious ways.
Now, don’t get me wrong. When there is something I am excited about I will tell the whole world on Facebook, to share something I find worth sharing. Most all of us do this nowadays. Most of the time I find it interesting to see what other people have going on, too. I will go around hitting the like button when people have something new they are excited about or something their kid did in school that made them proud. So, I know there is a difference with the once and awhile and the everyday blabbers.
The other day I was talking with a friend and (I use the word friend very loosely) I had just finished telling her that my uncle had passed and I was worried about my parents cleaning up his place where he mostly likely got the infection that killed him. Her response was to begin telling me about a party she was throwing next month. A simple I’m sorry to hear that would have been a better transition than to say nothing at all. I take back the word friend since this person is clearly not my friend.
The kind of people that really irks me is when they can’t shut up for two seconds to ask you how you are or what’s new with you because their lips are on autopilot of me, me, me!! The constant look what I got, look what I did and look where I have been. It’s draining and keeping up with the Kardashian’s is just not my style. I have pretty fancy things, a full closet of shoes, clothes and purses, I have the flat screens and computers and even the car I wanted. I can travel when I would like to, I can eat out if I want to… the list is endless. My appreciation of that fact is very high. I thank my lucky stars, pray to the gods and everything in between that I have the luxuries that I do.
With that simple fact, I do not flaunt everything I own, I do not point it out to every passerby, I do not name drop or show off every label that sits on my shelves. I actually always feel the need to spread the wealth, which actually isn’t all that much, but to share with people that are less fortunate or are in need. That need for the simple things that I know I take for granted. I could hoard all the things I want to myself, but giving to others at the expense of getting a the latest and greatest iPhone 5 for myself… well, that’s much more worth a sacrifice than to see people in need and know I could help and yet, I don’t.
I have a friend that I had asked to run in a race with me for Kidney disease, the disease that will most likely end my life if something else doesn’t do it first. I was taking donations and trying to get walkers. I had people driving hundreds of miles to show their support. She on the other hand made no effort whatsoever. No donation, but “hey, check out my LV purse I just got”. She didn’t even make the 10 mile drive to walk with me in the race, instead she actually asked me to ditch the race that I was organizing to go shopping with her. WTF, what now?! It was so eye opening to her personality that I haven’t been right with her since.
Again, I get that people can get excited, but sometimes some things are most important than your new watch or those awesome shades you just got. I beg, put your shit away and have a real conversation for once. Just shut up and listen to others around you, maybe you will make a real friend that could care less about what you have and only who you are. I would have been that friend but I have already moved on.
One last story before I move on…
If you are anything like the average person, you fantasize about winning the lottery and when you do you think of all the things you would do with it.
One night at my house a few of us were fantasizing about what we would all do with the 300 million dollar lottery that was up this weekend. Everyone had very interesting things that they would do with it. I, personally, wouldn’t really want anyone to know that I won. I would go around paying off everyone’s houses that were important to me, I would help people that I know need help and I would donate a large portion to many different causes that I care deeply about. I would, obviously, put away money for my kids, I would help all my family and friends that could use a little extra dough… wait, now, do I have any left?! But, for fun I would plan the biggest party I have ever thrown, a destination party of course, for everyone I love and care about. I could go on but you get where my mind is at.
My girlfriend said she wouldn’t give any of it to anyone. She would keep everything for herself and that she would probably invite people to spend time with her but she would never give anyone, any of it. Her husband said you wouldn’t even give some to my family or grandmother? Her response was no. The look on his face was priceless as he followed it up with, “this is who I married”. He had plans to give some to family and friends just like the rest of us. I wondered to myself about how that would work out if they really ever won, what would they do? And though I laughed I also wondered is that her real character, with some many people around us that are in need help and have constant struggle, could she really not help?
It is things like these that really surprise me with the way they think and how selfish or self-centered a person could be. I often wonder how do I find these people or how do they find me?
I feel that style and class only happens to very few and that everyone else just shows off. Who are any of us anyways, really?